A Teacher Turns 50

This summer this teacher - this wife, mother, daughter, friend, Christ-follower turned 50.

This week I completed prepping for the 26-27 school year. Posters hung, Google slides made, IEPs and 504s reviewed and signed. It’s my 6th year in the district, my 4th in this school, this grade level, this curriculum. So, not much should be new, but in many ways everything is.

Early in the summer I wrote reflecting over my last year. It was a doozy professionally. Overall though, I looked back and saw God’s grace woven through so many situations and circumstances. I know none of it was wasted. I came to the conclusion that every educator must make his/her own peace with the profession or else suffer, stress and succumb to eventual physical and emotional burnout.

Then midsummer I took an amazing, once-in-a-lifetime trip to England. I traveled by myself there and met my daughter in London. She and I made some core memories, but I also had time to adventure on my own. I did a lot of journaling and continued to reflect as I went to the Tower of London to see The Crown Jewels on my big, half century, milestone birthday.

(Btw, I have to confess that it was on this trip I learned the differences between London Bridge, Tower Bridge and the Tower of London. The London Bridge did fall down from fire, but has been rebuilt. From it you can see Tower Bridge, where Spiderman takes on Manifesto. And its two towers are near, but not apart of the Tower of London. It has its own set of towers and history.)

I am sure in time, I will blog more about my time in England and all that the Lord taught me. But today, it is the fact that He is teaching me that I want to write about - to show how this knowledge and acceptance is changing how I see myself when I look in the mirror, when I enter room 730 of Richview Middle and when I stand before Him.

This week in a guided prayer time, I came across these verses:

“Take my yoke upon you, and learn from we, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” ~ Matthew 11:29-39

I have treasured this passage for many years, claiming its promises that God would make my yoke easy and my burden light. My appreciation for this verse has always been about what I would gain from God, but rarely - if ever, did I take notice of other deeper truths that Jesus is giving here. Dane Ortlund wrote “Gentle and Lowly,” a book that I highly recommend, about what Jesus tells us about His character based on His words here. But what stood out to me this week in the middle of all of my profession development, classroom setup and faculty meetings was that Jesus is inviting me to LEARN from Him.

He is THE teacher - the ultimate Teacher, and I am the student. He says to first take “His” yoke and then to learn from Him. He tells me that His yoke is easy and His burden is light. The pronouns and conjunctions in this passage are not lost on this English teacher. He calls me to an easy submission and obedience that I might learn from Him to find rest for my inner most being, my soul. That sounds pretty good, right?

How do I learn from Jesus? I seek Him in His word by reading it for what it tells me about who He is - not what I can get from Him. I seek Him in prayer by intentionally spending time speaking to Him about all the things and by intently listening for what He has to say to me.

In the education spheres, they tell us to teach the kids to have a “growth mindset,” to embrace learning, evaluating and trying again. They want us to measure growth and celebrate the victories of improvement. Mastery is the goal, but acknowledging shortcomings to work at overcoming them is a big part of the process of meeting that goal. This mindset isn’t just for kids. It’s humbling, and sometimes embarrassing, to admit that I' haven’t gotten it —yet! And, I still have a long way to go.

Spiritually, I accepted a long time ago where I am in the sanctification process; God will carry out and complete the good work He began in me until Jesus returns or calls me home. (Philippians 1:6) I know I will fail, but I know His grace will continue to cover my sins.

Professionally, from student test scores and administrator observation rubrics, I embraced this summer the role of standardized tests. I can use them to help me but they will never define me. God has allowed me to grow as a teacher and seeing this is helping me to approach my school year with a confidence and freedom I have never had before. I am looking forward to making relationships with my new students without fearing a failure defined by a metric other than one I set for myself.

Personally, call it a midlife epiphany if you want, but . . . I am learning at 50 who God created me to be. The trip to England has been a big part of it, encouragement from friends and co-workers has been another. I’ve had a couple people acknowledge to me that they see my willingness to reflect and to learn as positive attributes of my personality.

Jesus is teaching me to see Him as He is, to see myself as He sees me and to interact with others as He would have me to, like He does. As a teacher, He is both patient and persistent. He is loving and wants to help me by walking WITH me as I learn. These are attributes that I can emulate.

Monday morning as I enter my classroom and turn on all the technology, my mind racing with the day’s responsibilities - as much as I am the teacher-in-charge, wearing my badge, swipe card and security tag - I am also the student. The students, colleagues and principals are not my teachers. The classroom is bigger than the 1200+ pupils the building holds. The lessons are bigger and more fulfilling.

I am excited about this school year, but for different reasons this year. It’s not the new haircut or a fresh pack of flair pens. I am not the same person that finished last school year in May. A lot is the same, but He is truly making everything new. (Revelation 21:5)

Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash